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Love Systems Routines Manual VOLUME 1 - Free ebook download as PDF File ( .pdf), Text File .txt) or read book online for free. What's the secret to mastering. Volume Sample Pack . new Love Systems Routines Manual Volume 2, with hundreds .. Follow–On 1: “So, obviously I need to cut her loose but I. The popularity of the Love Systems Routines Manual Volume 1 prompted us to write this second volume to help you further build an effective arsenal of material .
We choose identities that play to our strengths but this can be limiting and boring over a long period. We actually address this in the book. Then you can say your secretary is really a fat 40 year old man called Bubba. First of all you need passion. This is great to make clear in a playful way that you are sizing her up romantically while ramping up the physical progression.
Second, people value what they have to work for. The Qualification phase is where we solve both problems by 1 helping her work for your interest and then 2 giving it to her based on something other than her looks alone. The Qualification phase is usually where you make your interest in her explicit.
Feeling comfort and connection with him [Comfort] Comfort is usually the longest phase in the Emotional Progression Model. It ends when you have established enough comfort and connection with her that she is comfortable being in a sexual situation with you. A sexual situation is one in which a woman is emotionally ready to engage in sexual behavior touching that goes beyond kissing in a place where sex could realistically happen. Feeling aroused by him without awkwardness or embarrassment [Seduction] Seduction is based primarily on intensifying her willingness to have sex with you and mitigating her reasons not to.
We do this because the processes themselves are different. Physically, you are trying to arouse her. Emotionally, you are trying to make her comfortable with being aroused by you. These are: It ends when you start a conversation with her - usually about a specific subject. Turning a single-subject approach into a normal, free-flowing conversation To attract a woman, you should be in a conversation with her that can include a variety of topics and where you can express emotion.
The Transition introduces at least one new topic by changing the subject and refocuses the dynamic of your interaction. Key Tips to Remember:. Attraction comes before Qualification. Attraction comes before Comfort. Qualification comes before Comfort. Comfort comes before Seduction. Earlier versions of Love Systems featured only the breakthrough concepts of the Emotional Progression Model.
The idea of a step-by-step model and a correct identification of the key emotional phases was revolutionary at the time, and one of the reasons why Love Systems is recognized today as the leading dating coaching group. Still, like any simplification, it has its limits. I remember a date I was on few years ago, before I discovered Love Systems. My friend set me up. She was a graduate student, intelligent, playful, and very attractive.
We had a ton in common, from taste in books and music to a shared interest in history, astronomy and classic cult movies. I thought our date went well, with lots of laughs and great conversation. But when I tried to kiss her at the end of the night, she pulled away. But in this case her meaning was easy to interpret: Rather, you are copying the intuitive touching that many charismatic men do naturally.
For example, U. President Bill Clinton had an amazing ability to connect with people. The other day I was watching an old newscast, and saw him shaking hands with someone. I must have replayed it four times - there was so much going on. Then he said a couple of words, laughed, and tapped him on the shoulder, all within a couple of Sometimes you have to try to deliberately overshoot the mark to find out where the limits really are.
You probably have much more freedom than you think. Social Touch Social Touch is the kind of touch that would be socially appropriate if the person you are touching is a complete stranger. Generally, this kind of touch is on the elbow, shoulder, or hands. Common examples of social touch include:. With Social Touch, you should touch everyone in a group who is close to you and treat everyone equally.
No special attention for women, let alone for the woman you are specifically interested in. Some Social Touch opportunities will almost always be there.
Other opportunities need to be created. You can and should initiate social touch as early as possible in an interaction, usually within 30 seconds. This is important for establishing momentum to move forward into the next phase of the Physical Progression Model: Friendly Touch. This is really important. Compare two approaches. It feels natural, as escalating physical touch always should. When I try the same arm-around-her move a few minutes into the conversation, people will notice.
Friendly Touch Friendly Touch implies that you and the person you are touching are more than strangers. For example:. Often, things that qualify as Friendly Touch could also be Romantic Touch, depending on the context and duration. Friendly touch is a crucial bridge between Social Touch available to anyone and Romantic Touch available only to potential romantic connections.
Pull away? Intensify the connection? She can be enjoying the feeling of Romantic Touch, enjoying the flirting, enjoying the sexual tension, and have absolutely no intention of proceeding further. Examples of Romantic Touch include: Note that Romantic Touch is not explicitly sexual.
The makeout is an important signpost in the Physical Progression Model. But see the chapter on Kissing in the book Magic Bullets for some big pitfalls about kissing too soon or how it can dissipate sexual tension and kill your chances of advancing into Sexual Touch.
Sexual Touch Sexual touch is the end zone of the physical model. It includes anything past kissing. Most of the time, these issues are emotional, not physical, and are dealt with in the chapter on Seduction in Magic Bullets. But what does this actually mean? This only applies to her people. Your friends should be on your side and know what to do. This is why lots of guys come to Love Systems live training workshops with their friends, or end up finding quality wingmen there.
Few women normally want to hook up while their friends look on. While advanced guys are good at changing this dynamic - something we talk about in our advanced Her place is okay too, but usually not as effective. Other factors come into play logistically — for example, how much time she has, whether she has to get up in the morning, etc. You live 45 minutes away, and both drove separate cars to get there.
You, my friend, are not going home with her tonight. In fact, as we will see, it was counter-productive to advance so far Emotionally and Physically when your Logistics were so unfavorable. Hence, the importance of being able to quickly assess and manage logistics.
Because the Logistical Progression Model has two separate variables Social and Location , it is a little bit more flexible than the stricter step-by-step Emotional and Physical systems. In other words, you can do the two major steps in any order. You can get her alone first, and then take her home. Or you can take her home first and then her friends leave or get distracted for long enough. Or you can do both at once — e. Those are your basic plays, but there are also a bunch of intermediate steps available to you, depending on the situation.
The latter option is another reason why good wingmen are so valuable. Location Logistics. These are the easiest moves to make. In a club, for example, you can move a woman to the outdoor patio, to the bar to get a drink, to a quiet area to sit, to the dance floor, to another part of the club where they have different music, to look for your friends, etc.
In-venue moves can give you usually temporary privacy from her friends, but even if her friends come with you, these moves are helpful for building momentum toward bigger moves later.
Ideally these should trend geographically toward home. For example, you might meet a woman at a restaurant, and then suggest grabbing a drink — at a place that is conveniently near where you live, building momentum for the big move to your place later on.
In general, the more attractive the woman and the bigger the city, the more risks you take by settling for a phone number. Only rely on the phone number when other paths forward are truly closed. When other guys get phone numbers, we get the girl. These location tools are especially effective when you use little moves to create momentum. Because everyone is unique, some implications may be more important to your style than others.
But here are a few important ones to get you started:. Taking the useless extra stuff out of your game should already improve your results. So - whenever you feel stuck — move toward the center. It will bore or frustrate most women. Lack of momentum can work against you through no fault of your own. Momentum can also work for you.
Each phase that you can smoothly pass through builds up your momentum for the next one. By the way, this is where the more advanced concepts of investment and social momentum otherwise outside the scope of this chapter come into play. The three models are not isolated and separate. For example, the very act of moving up the first two steps on the Physical Progression Model will help you emotionally. Study after study has shown that women are more apt to be sexually and romantically interested in men when there is appropriate touching as a subtext to their conversation.
This actually applies to nonromantic interactions as well. Some other examples: The more contexts in which she sees herself with you, the better she will feel she knows you.
For example, a date that hits three places for an hour each is much better than a date that stays in one place for three hours. Building deep comfort when there is no physical conversation is the easiest way to get her to say: When you approach a woman or a group of people, you have to evaluate what type of opener is best for the situation: All of them have pros and cons.
Direct openers work less often, but when they do, your value starts off high because the woman has accepted your initial frame. The Love Systems model is a step-by-step approach.
Take it one step at a time. Remember that approaching is really not that big of a deal. People talk to strangers all the time, and you should never feel guilt or shame about wanting to talk to a new woman. If you have women in your life, it should be natural for you to talk to attractive women when the mood strikes you. If you find yourself freezing with approach anxiety, this is usually because you fear rejection. The more you are rejected, the less it will affect you and the better your approach skills will become.
One of the best ways to reduce approach anxiety and the chance of rejection is to put yourself in a social mood by doing warm ups. Pre-selection plays on the fact that women are attracted to men who are attractive to other women. Role-plays conjure up a fun imaginary situation and project you and the woman into it. Tap her on the shoulder and point to your friend. I was going to pass you a note, but I figured it would be good practice for him to talk to you.
Braddock, Love Systems Instructor. SCALE OF This is a fun, direct opener good for loud clubs and high energy venues where opinion openers would lower the energy too much. Keep them short in clubs.
So, are you guys having fun? If she said ten, she becomes a twelve. Have fun with it and they will too. This one is all about the energy level.
When you bring energy to the interaction, it works amazingly well. This is a great club opener. Dahunter, Love Systems Instructor. Delivered in a deadpan, smart-ass tone, it usually gets a laugh for the absurdity. For example, dancing:. There are people trying to relax and study and stuff.
Have an item in hand or just be staring into a shop window at some products. What do you think? Or say instead: Can you give me an opinion on something? I mean about you and me! Look how fucking hot we are! We should have a few little ones and sell them to Brad and Angelina Simply type into your phone:.
And then start trading messages. Open with: You guys are so much fun to hang out with. A guy would have to be crazy to even try to approach you guys.
You must avoid this at all costs. Use the following to get out of it. I like you guys and I would hate to see him beat you up. I will help you get guys to come over and run through your gauntlet. I love watching you humiliate them. Take the girl you are interested in and teach her how to properly get a guy to perform their tasks by being sexy and persuasive. Be very sexually flirtatious in your demonstration and send her on her mission.
Continue working the group and being the life of the party until you can isolate the girl you are interested in. It shocks them into reacting and can create a playful vibe from the start. For example: Then, you can say: Kisser, Love Systems Instructor. Indirect openers use a pretext to approach: A positive, genuine-sounding delivery helps ensure a positive response.
This is particularly good for especially hot women who have a large social circle that makes them less accessible, or women who have blown off several guys before you. Turn to her and simply say: Are you having fun? Move onto something else and keep the positive momentum rolling.
You will be in good shape right out of the gate. M, Love Systems Instructor For instance, me and my ex used to play this game when we went out to the clubs: Continue with: Cleopatra over here Simply asking a question is fine but sometimes they can fall flat if they come across too heavy, literal and serious. This is a good example of a casual opener that has a better chance of flowing into further conversation. A small joke is built in, showing that you have a sense of humor which makes them more apt to want to continue the conversation.
Humor is always attractive. I have three friends in long-distance relationships right now. Sorry to rain on the parade.
It has some shock value to it, but most women laugh and have a completely My buddy Mike was coming to meet me here tonight and his girlfriend was digging around on his computer and found a folder with porn in it and completely flipped out. Humor is built in and delivered with an awareness of the funny side of the situation.
Any ideas? Assume your topic is interesting and that the women will care even if it is inconsequential.
But then my friend said he could go longer, so I had to take him on. Some women will love you right away just for asking this, some women will be disgusted.
Try to adjust your performance based on the reactions and make it work. And he totally said the most retarded thing! Then change the subject to something less controversial that will make you seem more down-to-earth.
Tenmagnet and Future, Love Systems Instructors. If you want to let your interest be known right away akin to a direct opener you can not only agree with what the woman says but also tell her that she looks much sexier than the woman she just mentioned. Or you can disqualify by disagreeing with whomever they name, and then say you think they look like someone else.
You can even mention someone less attractive or less famous than the person she named. You could then tell a story of something crazy that happened to you as a result of someone mistaking you for that person. I think they must be obsessed with Nicolas Cage over there or something. One night, I had just gotten off stage in Russell Square and I was walking with my girlfriend to the local pub, when some drunk girl thought I was Nicolas Cage. Why do we transition?
Think about how many times this has happened to you: The energy dissipates. Out of nowhere, she loses interest. What just happened? You failed to transition out of your opener into something else interesting.
Women need their emotional states pumped through a range of emotions at all times, but particularly when you first meet them. So you need to change the topic. The key is to bridge the gap between approaching and attraction with a transition, which is most easily done with a statement based on something you notice about her or her group.
You can think about it like a pendulum: Then, as the pendulum swings all the way to the right, you have to switch gears, transition and talk about something related to her.
It can also be done at any point in the conversation where names come up. Are you kidding me? Observe something and comment on it.
This can be done spontaneously, based on things you actually see and think are true, or you can use a prepared cold read because they lead to predictable responses that you can follow with ready-made jokes. We would never get along. You dog people are all clingy, needy, and supplicating. Have you ever seen two cats in the alley when they approach each other? I better watch out for you. You and me are so not going to get along. The comedy that I write and perform is on the complete other end of the comedic spectrum.
We are too similar. The idea here is to transition off the approach with a cold read while disqualifying at the same time. BIG EYES This is a great observational routine that teaches her something and gets things moving around while creating some fun with the camera instead of just keeping it conversational. Do you like the way you look in photos?
But there is a trick I found that will instantly help you look a little better in your photos. There are five traits that pre dominantly determine whether you are beautiful or not Facial asymmetry, body fat percentage, muscle tone and proportion, and skin tone These traits 95 per cent of the time will deem you gorgeous, ugly, or somewhere in between. Look around at all the attractive people in the world..
What do they all have in common outside beauty? They all have big eyes. And while not every beautiful woman has big eyes, the correlation is astounding. Why do you think Japanese cartoon characters always have huge eyes? All you have to do is raise your eyebrows a little bit. And open the eyes slightly wider than normal. Raising the eyebrows is also a natural human reaction to happiness, which will make you look friendlier.
Then compare the two pictures. You can even ask someone else to evaluate which looks better. Green Hell, Attraction Forums Member The point of attraction is to get to qualification and ultimately comfort, but a woman will only allow that when sufficiently attracted. The Attraction phase is crucial. If executed effectively, it allows you to move forward into comfort, where the real work of seduction is done. This opens a wide range of strategies to accomplish this goal.
We can distinguish between strategies by classifying routines as either state-based game or intrigue-based game. The strategy is to pump up her buying temperature by making her emotionally stimulated, happy, amused, light-hearted and free. Playful, silly routines, humor, teasing and physically oriented routines tend to accomplish this. The objective is to positively stimulate her emotions.
Lightning Round Sweater Swap 12 Wives. Intrigue-based game appeals to her mind. It targets her intellect, curiosity, fascination, and beliefs and creates new realms of possibility and knowledge. Smart, interesting routines that teach her something or explore intriguing ideas are tools for this. These can be very powerful in showing that you are a thoughtful person who understands the world and speaks with authority.
They can stimulate paradigm shifts in her mind. Obviously, intrigue game works very well with intelligent women, but it can appeal to all types when delivered in a down-to-earth, unpretentious way. Many men are better at delivering one of these types than the other. Guys who are high-energy, funny and aggressive tend to lean toward state-based game while guys who are thoughtful, more cerebral and sensitive prefer intrigue-based game. Playing to your strength is good, but most of the best guys can deliver a balanced combination of both.
Too much state-based game can make you seem like a clown who never settles down and too much intrigue game can get dull and overly intellectual. Finding a balance to target both her emotions and her mind heightens the power of your interactions.
You can satisfy her on both an emotional and intellectual level. The Don, Love Systems Instructor. This can be useful but it has its limits. Most of the time we recommend it just as an exercise in enduring social pressure. For those who insist on it, here are the 10 commandments of plowing. Plowing is inherently fairly rude. Once you hit the point that you need to plow, your social value is low enough that it would be like a bum teasing them.
Keep it positive. This stems from a concept called cognitive dissonance. Cognitive dissonance is the process we go through to align our behaviors with what we perceive to be our character.
However, if you break any social convention, bore them, or are rude they can treat you badly with no repercussions. Keep stacking attraction material. This comes down to flexibility. Guess what? Ask questions to keep them engaged. Tell long stories that require a lot of attention. Make them laugh. Humor fixes almost everything.
You have to act like you are all friends and they are really into talking to you. Plow for more than 10 minutes. Remember there are women out there who will like you. If none of this works, you can always go talk to other women in front of this group and come back in an hour or so. It could be alcohol, the other guys that talked to them being lame or whatever, but a lot of good things come from re-approaching cold groups.
Here, you talk to her. This can escalate with you coaxing the woman to come up with increasingly odd and perverted things to text back and then teasing her for her antics. Make a scene when she actually sends something outrageous, telling her that she is ruining your social I think you could be the perfect decoy. Please, try to restrain yourself.
If you can last 15 minutes without making out with me, you get a free blender. Kind of like when you go to the bank and they give you a free toaster for getting a new account. Something tells me you like to be a bad little girl Brad P. It can be funny as well if delivered right. You son of a bitch!
Are you guys okay? Welcome to Hollywood! So now I have a choice Or do I use some kind of Jedi Mind Trick to get him to leave me alone? What would you have done? And the guy is totally thrown for a loop. And then, he just throws up his hands in frustration and storms inside the club because I was taking too long on the call.
It was crazy. Out of nowhere, say, like a game show host: Other questions you can ask:. Of course, let them ask questions back if they want to. If one girl is totally nuts, declare her champion. Creating familiarity is not the goal. Take your phone and hump hers a few times with yours. Humming porno music is optional. Moxie, Love Systems Instructor Many men are boring because they are so literal and emotionally cold.
Being playful and sometimes behaving and talking about things from childhood can be liberating and show a woman that you share the same goal of having a good time and regressing.
Start off with:. No way! Sweater Swap was the coolest game ever!! Did you say your name was X? There used to be this girl named X back in the seventh grade who had the biggest crush on me ever! Check this out… When I was in the seventh grade we would go outside to play in the schoolyard right after lunch and play kick-ball.
But before we started playing we would take off our sweaters and jackets and throw them in this huge pile. That meant you were kind of going steady and potentially every day you could have a new chick! I used to have these two girls that always picked me. They were these cute little cheerleaders, Gwen and Tammy what names, huh?
It was so cute. I was such a dork. So… who knows? But you have to promise not to tell Gwen or Tammy. It shows that you have other women in your life who like you a lot and says that you care about them and treat them well.
It can also be used as an opener. She is a bit of a princess. Really pretty and a little high maintenance, like you. What should I get her? We go for breaks and lunch together. We also talk about personal stuff most of the time. We take care of each other all day.
Run with it and ask what gift you should get her and then later you can call back to it You can be one of my wives. Each one of my wives has like a special skill. What can you do? I need an explosives expert to send on missions with my kung fu wife. Then proceed to marry and divorce her all night for silly reasons that come up as a way to keep the tension and joke going.
This can really be done in either comfort or attraction -- wherever the conversation warrants. Contingencies for both are included below. And I wanted to include her in stuff. I wanted to introduce her to people, I wanted to be proud of her, and things were going so well for me that I wanted her to be part of it. Women generally like attention. Savoy, President of Love Systems. She answers, then take her left hand and turn it palm up and hold her ring finger.
Learn a little about hand massage to do this well. Let some tension build up and then ask…. Then jump to the explanation… If she says yes: Then just explain. It was a way to keep the other person close to your heart. They use it to stimulate energy to the heart. Out of nowhere, this girl the one that you look like walked up to me and said: It would really turn me on if you would slap me. You can vary this to being a lip kiss as well. I just stood there, expecting some camera crew to run up to me, but nothing happened.
She just slapped me, kissed me, and then ran off. It explains in a fun way to women how certain characteristics make a woman beautiful and, most importantly, why.
It helps you demonstrate value by showing intelligence on a subject that women value highly. In a group, you can point at the women with blue eyes and state that they are the most attractive to men. Blue eyes are a freak accident of evolution and normally all freak accidents are wiped out within one generation. Imagine for example somebody being born with blue skin or three legs… But blue eyes were not wiped out for the simple reason that they are more seductive than brown eyes, which is the original eye color all people had.
You see, when a woman finds a guy attractive her pupils will dilate and there is nothing she can do about it. Normally they will really be looking at your eyes now. If you have blue eyes, all the better but if you have brown eyes, like myself, then you can say the following and make yourself a bit of a challenge to them.
So the blond hair another freak accident of nature was one of the few characteristics left that men could use to correctly assess the age of women and the younger a woman is, the more fertile and attractive she is. Essentially, dying your hair. Here you can also use the fact that they dye their hair blond for a cold read about their honesty. Ask blond girls to picture themselves when they were still just little girls, and how much lighter their hair was then compared to the natural color now.
The first part allows the opportunity for call-back humor, which is the idea of referring back to a joke all night for more laughs…in this case calling her by her stripper name rather than her real one. Amber is such a stripper name. Improvise off of her answer, come up with other funny stripper names for her, portray her as naughty, etc. Pick us up. Give her all sorts of funny resistance. Such as:. Have fun with it. Then, as the night goes on, only call her by her Stripper or Boy Name as call-back humor.
Use it again on the phone call or in text when reinitiating contact later to remind her of the fun you had. Keep stroking her hand. Tell me, what do your people eat on earth? Tell me what do you guys do with retarded people on your planet? Do you know what we do with retarded people on Mars? Moxie, Love Systems Instructor. It works like a big disqualifier, and releases a lot of emotion. When the routine progresses and she ends up laughing it will seem all the more exciting to her because of the contrasting emotions, creating a great first impression.
Wait for her reaction. If she laughs wait for her to settle, then continue. If she looks shocked, wait an extra second or two then continue. The only unfavorable reaction is no reaction, in which case plow forward.
He convinced me to sit up front with him by promising to tell me jokes. Anyways, he goes on and tells me all of these other jokes just like that one.
All jokes about wives and women. Pause again to let the possibility of slight offense settle in for more damage control. Often a girl is hooked by this point and is willing to extend the benefit of the doubt while you finish. She said yes and they were married 12 days later. Never an unhappy day since. Pause to get a reaction. If she wants to talk, then this is a great opportunity for her to qualify herself by telling a story, or by asking questions about you and relationships.
Segue it into the following by giving insight on relationships. The point of the study is to figure out what really makes relationships successful. What the researchers do is have couples come in and they ask the couples to talk about things that make them fight, like money or the dishes or whatever. And they measure everything imaginable about these fights: This is an important question to ask because it engages her.
Take a long pause here to let the girl interact with the routine and share her experiences. This is another great opportunity for her to qualify herself further. Other people say laughter. A lot of people mention eye contact. When one person rolls his or her eyes, the other person immediately becomes more defensive and the level of conflict escalates, and misery ensues.
It shows a lack of respect, and respecting each other is one of the most important ingredients in a relationship. That and This creates the opportunity for call-back humor later when you roll your eyes dramatically at something silly she says. You can also use this routine straight out of the gate as an opener by opening directly with the joke which is bold but effective at creating a strong emotion from the start.
Mike Long, Area 51 Lifestyle. Disqualification exists to accentuate the attraction you are building with your demonstrations of higher value or DHVs. In simple terms, attraction is built of two parts:. Of the two, disqualification is the less important. It is peppered in among DHVs to create a sense of ambiguity as to whether you are romantically interested in the woman. Disqualification does not generally create lasting attraction by itself without DHVs mixed in.
If you simply push women away they will leave. They have no reason to stay related to your value. So, you should use disqualifiers to increase the value of your DHVs but if you worry about disqualifying more than pulling them in with DHVs you will lose most of the women you meet. Focus more attention on making yourself look good and bringing value to the interaction than on disqualifying.
Think of it as 70 to 80 percent pulling with DHVs and 20 to 30 percent pushing with disqualifiers. You can use it as a running joke throughout the night when you physically escalate to lighten things up as well. Wow, that made me excited. No girl has ever touched my leg before.
Can I hold your hand? Like any good role-play, take it to its furthest logical conclusion.
Turning the topic to sex while simultaneously disqualifying yourself broaches the subject in a non-creepy way. Maybe you recognized me? For example if she is really tall: I like you. Otherwise it might have worked out. Braddock, Love Systems Instructor Pointing to her. You remember the one I told you about? If she touches you too much. But I will tickle you until you pee your pants. Many students on a Love Systems live bootcamp where we teach our strategies live on real women get completely caught up on approaching and attracting girls.
While these are crucial steps, understanding qualification and the value of setting a qualifying frame is crucial to not only successfully getting a woman — but getting better with women generally.
All very successful guys I know use qualification extremely well. On the surface, qualifying a woman allows her to feel you like her for reasons deeper than just her looks.
She thus feels validated and more strongly connected to you. However, the effect of qualifying goes far deeper than this. If you are this type of man - a sexual selector - then you naturally qualify women because looks become a mere prerequisite. It would take something more than tits and an ass to impress you. Interestingly, if you are in this frame of mind where you are inherently judging the person, you immediately assume higher value on your own part.
Qualifying someone properly is therefore a very powerful signaling mechanism that show you are a high-value sexual selector. It signifies to women that beauty is common in your world and you expect far more than just looks. Qualifying a woman, if done correctly, challenges her to meet your standards, thus flipping the frame and making you the selector. This is the power of qualification -- if applied correctly it validates her but also gets her chasing you.
You are the one being sought after and the woman has to prove herself to you. Ask yourself what you want in a woman besides looks? Does this woman meet your standards as a human being? Now, spend your Qualification phase looking for precisely that. For example, among other things, I value intelligence and education. I screen for this in qualification, by asking her about books she has read and movies she has seen. I ask the following questions in qualification:.
Do you have a passion outside of work? Try to inquire a bit deeper and get some unique information. Qualification should connect with the girl on a more emotional level. The point is to make her work a little for your approval.
The crux is this: The Qualification phase is based more on deep rapport i. You will continue to qualify a woman during comfort and even after you have slept with her and begun a relationship. A fundamental objective to achieve in comfort is to create contrast in your personality. By contrast I mean showing a wide range of positive characteristics and not coming off as one-dimensional and predictable. Many guys have a sort of default setting in terms of the persona they display to women.
We choose identities that play to our strengths but this can be limiting and boring over a long period. To create contrast and be more interesting and dynamic in your interactions, pay attention to what you are doing repeatedly and consciously.
Add other dimensions in the Comfort phase to create new layers that build curiosity and deeper levels of attraction. You may be really funny and entertaining but that can lead to you coming off as a clown.
If you pepper the interaction with deep, sincere and thoughtful conversation, it creates a whole new picture of you.
Now you are an intelligent, interesting person with a great sense of humor and not just a clown out for laughs. If you tend to be reserved and thoughtful in your interactions, throwing out a goofy role-play or the occasional dry arrogant tease can mix things up. It jolts her back to a flirtatious, playful state and out of a strictly heady, intellectual one.
When you create contrast and you are a combination of funny, thoughtful, cocky, playful, intelligent, sincere, flirtatious, wise, etc. The idea is that, in many cases, 80 percent of results come from 20 percent of events. And 20 percent of the population makes 80 percent of. The average person wears 20 percent of his or her clothes 80 percent of the time. It stems from a belief in a universal balance.
The concept can be a little tricky to explain with words only, so a graph is included below. You can just trace with your hands as you explain the concept to a woman. The woman is chilling. Is he going to call me after? Are all my. Men and women both invest equally in relationships, just on two distinct time frames but it all balances out in the end. It sends a strong message through a metaphor. We do the same thing with relationships. Because we have two years invested in a relationship, we try to make something bad work even though in our hearts we know the prospects are bad.
Take this on a carpe diem theme in general and talk about dreams and things she wants to do in the future. The facts are straightforward — he met a girl and had sex on the beach with her — but his retelling of the story is a great example of using emotional language to build comfort. The routine includes lots of positive sentiment and sets a tone of adventure, spontaneity, romance and sexuality.
I went to this huge Full Moon Party. There were people everywhere, drinking and dancing on the beach. On the side of the beach I saw this absolutely beautiful girl sitting by herself. About two hours later, we were both drunk on buckets of cocktails and staring out at the ocean. Something clicked between us, and between the alcohol, the sun setting and the soft, warm sand beneath us, it was like we were perfectly in sync with each other. It was just her and me in this beautiful little bubble, while the outside world partied and kept spinning without us.
Too often in the big city people lose sight of that freedom.
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