FREE PDF Download The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World For I-pad. Go to the profile of Roni C Griggs. Roni C Griggs. How do you define “introvert?” 1) Let's look at some of the myths surrounding “ introverts” today: a) Introverts The Introvert Advantage, Marti Olsen Laney, Psy. D. PdF Download The Introvert Advantage: How Quiet People Can Thrive in an Extrovert World Full epubThe Introvert Advantage: How Quiet People Can Thrive in.
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The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World. Home · The Fibonacci Trading: How to Master the Time and Price Advantage. Read more. The Introvert Advantage: How Quiet People Can Thrive in an Extrovert World Paperback – February 1, It helps readers understand introversion and shows them how to determine where they fall on the introvert/extrovert continuum. Marti Olsen Laney, Psy.D., is a researcher. The Introvert Advantage: How Quiet People Can Thrive in an Extrovert World. By Marti Olsen .. The Introvert Advantage - Marti Olsen Laney. The Introvert.
Or I would think of something to say in class, raise my hand—thrilled that I might improve the 25 percent of my grade that was based on class participation—but when I was called on, my comment would disappear into thin air. I did not find much time at all spent on the ways our introversion makes us good dates, good co-workers, good parents. Introverts are hardwired from birth to focus inward, so outside stimulation—chitchat, phone calls, parties, office meetings—can easily become "too much. Create a List. Rating details. I hoped it would, more like. I highly recommend this for all introverts, so they can better understand themselves and know that they aren't weird -- they are actually quite normal in this extroverted world.
Open Preview See a Problem? Details if other: Thanks for telling us about the problem. Return to Book Page. The Introvert Advantage: Do you "zone out" if too much is going on?
Are you energised by spending time alone? In meetings, do you need to be asked for your opinions and ideas? Do you tend to notice details that other people miss? Is your ideal celebration a small get-together, rather than a big party? Do you often feel like a tortoise surrounded by hares? The good news is, you're an introvert. The Do you "zone out" if too much is going on? Covering relationships, parenting - including parenting the introverted child - socialising, and the workplace, here are coping strategies, tactics for managing energy, and hundreds of valuable tips for not only surviving but truly thriving in an extrovert world.
Get A Copy. Paperback , pages. Published February 1st by Workman Publishing Company first published More Details Original Title. Other Editions Friend Reviews. To see what your friends thought of this book, please sign up. To ask other readers questions about The Introvert Advantage , please sign up.
Jordan Lombard You will have to go buy the book at your local bookstore or borrow it at your local library! See 2 questions about The Introvert Advantage…. Lists with This Book. Community Reviews. Showing Rating details. Sort order. Mar 12, Lafcadio rated it did not like it Shelves: This book started out OK, but the more I read, the more I felt insulted. Laney goes out of her way to make sure you know that being an introvert is not the same thing as being shy or having social anxiety.
Then in nearly every list of suggestions for dealing with other people, she includes "breathe. She also goes on and on about introverts being slow thinkers and slow processors and slow workers. That's not really what it's about. Introverts will make sure they have valid arguments to back up their statements all organized in their heads before they voice their statements out loud. It's not that they haven't thought of anything to say yet, it's that they haven't decided if it's worth saying it out loud even if you ask them point blank about their thoughts.
If you blurt out the first sentence that comes to mind while I'm still organizing my entire essay in my head, and then you call me a slow thinker, I will punch you in the face repeatedly, in my mind. And then I speak less. And yes , I do not like to be interrupted while I'm working on a project, but it's not going to take me half a day to get back on track. And no, deadlines don't freak me out.
Don't tell me to breathe again. The sections about how to be normal at a party and how to date were insulting as well. If being an introvert is not the same thing as having a social phobia, then I can handle myself at a party or on a date just fine, thankyouverymuch. I'll never be the life of the party, or even the life of the conversation, but I'm an introvert, so I don't want to be , no matter how many lessons in small talk you give me. How do you know the host?
Hi, I love the music they're playing. Do you know the name of the piece? Hi, I'm Marti; Jim is my boss. Isn't this a beautiful home? Isn't the food delicious?
I love this backyard.
It's not that I don't know how to ask the world's most boring questions to start a conversation. It's that the conversation that would ensue from that point forward would have me napping in no time.
View all 30 comments. Dec 16, Ilona rated it did not like it Shelves: I am an introvert. When I first heard about this book, I was curious and eager to read it. A few introvert friends read it, and praised it to the skies. I read it, and It took me a while to determine why thus proving myself an introvert but by the last chapters, I had it figured out. The title of this book is "The Introvert Advantage: How to Thrive in an Extrovert World.
Making the Most of Your Hidden Strengths".
As far as I am concerned, its title should be "Overcomin I am an introvert. As far as I am concerned, its title should be "Overcoming the Handicap of Introversion: How to Survive in an Extrovert World". Introvert strengths? Where are they? Despite the title, there's not much of them to be seen in this book. The author tells us she interviewed 50 introverts for the purposes of this book.
Fifty, I might add, is not a large sample.
Of these 50, only one -- only ONE -- felt confident and happy in his introversion. No wonder the book is so skewed in the direction of assuring us we're not defective. Assuring us we are worthwhile.
Assuring us we can cope Our strengths, not in opposition to extroverts, our strengths not to be used to overcome the adversity of being introverts. I am a happy, self-confident introvert with a circle of friends that is not large see above, "I am an introvert" , but which more than adequately meets my needs.
I am a happy, self-confident, socially secure introvert who, page after page after page, kept waiting for the part of the book that would describe the advantages of introversion. Where was it? I read about how to cope with dating. How to cope with parties. How to cope with the demands of parenting, of a job, of life in general. I did not find much time at all spent on the ways our introversion makes us good dates, good co-workers, good parents.
The advantages of introversion. Where are they in this book? We are self-aware and capable of great introspection, we are told Meet at a neutral location. Use your good observational skills to gain information about the person.
I'm an introvert. I guess I can't be expected to figure this complicated social stuff out. We're easily tired, we speak slowly, we struggle for words, we move slowly, it has never occurred to us that we can go to a party for an hour instead of staying till the last drunk wobbles home.
Though strengths of introversion are mentioned -- we think deeply, we enjoy analysis and introspection, we are creative, we consider our words before blurting them out -- these things are only mentioned. They are not expanded upon significantly at all. Rather, by far the primary focus of the book is tips and techniques for surviving in an extroverted world.
Not "thriving", no. It's merest survival. Getting by. Overcoming the handicaps of introversion. Becoming adequate to the challenges of extroversion. I was disappointed in this book. As an introvert, I found it patronizing and at points downright insulting. If I were an extrovert reading this book, I'm sure I'd end up thinking introverts were a pathetic bunch of delicate flowers, wilting limply at the simplest of social demands. How about some chapters on what introverts bring to relationships, the workplace, the family?
How about some time spent on how extroverts can learn from introverts, the things that we have that would benefit the world at large? Imagine a family where people thought before they spoke. Imagine a workplace where people didn't interrupt each other, but let the other guy speak their full thought Imagine a society where it was routine to take time to reflect on actions, before and after.
I can imagine it.
Seems Dr. Laney cannot. And that? Is a shame. View all 14 comments. Jul 22, Jennifer rated it liked it Shelves: The two things I heard most in my youth: And the other: Anyway, I'm still quiet, and have married into a spastically extroverted family. I'm eager to read this book, and welcome any goo The two things I heard most in my youth: I'm eager to read this book, and welcome any good advice liquor has already been suggested. View all 13 comments. Feb 17, Skylar Burris rated it it was ok Shelves: This review has been published elsewhere as "Introverts Are Not Idiots.
Mar 03, Tim rated it it was ok. Since reading Mr. Jung's book about personality types, I have often wondered what use or point these types of classifications can really have. Jung, himself, cautions that though thinking about personality types can be enlightening, we should never make the mistake of thinking that we are talking about something real. It is the dichotomy present in stereotypes in general: La Since reading Mr. Laney's book is a perfect example of this dichotomy in action.
Before I continue, I should mention that in every personality test I have taken, I have come up a strong introvert.
Anyway, in Ms. Laney's book I read many things about myself that were eerily accurate, and that I didn't know were even connected to my personality type. For example, I really dislike being interrupted when I'm thinking about something. I had no idea that this was connected to introversion at all, I just thought it was a quirk of my personality.
Laney points out that a lot of introverts feel this way. Other reviewers have mentioned the wealth of "a-ha" moments like this present in the book. Having said that, there are several other facets of Ms. Laney's descriptions of introverts that I was the exact opposite of. Some of them are very slight, but others are more important.
For example, Ms. Laney bases her whole explanation of introverts around the idea that introverts draw energy from within, and that external stimulation, whether it be conversation with friends or the infamous "smoky Las Vegas casino," drains this energy and causes introverts to, eventually, reach a kind of crisis point where they have to recharge immediately. In my own experience, this is fundamentally untrue.
I love smoky Las Vegas casinos, with all their noise and action, and as long as I like the people I'm talking to, I would prefer to stay up and talk to them all night. And when I have stayed up and talked to people all night, I do not find myself drained the next day, but rather refreshed albeit very hungover.
Even the idea that I draw energy from within is fundamentally incorrect. Long before I read this book, I spent a considerable amount of time thinking about what inspires and recharges me. My realization about this was that I am inspired by conversation with people I like, and by good art, whether it be books or movies or music or paintings or whatever.
All of these things, you will notice, are external to me, not internal. Furthermore, the more extreme the impression the external thing makes upon me, the more the art or the conversation intrudes into my internal world, the more I like it.
So, in reading this book, I was constantly confused by what advice or understanding I could take from it. Everything in it was true, except the things that were false. And some of the false things were fundamental to the entire theory being argued. Because of this, it was impossible to believe the argument of the book as a whole, or to take seriously most of the advice given in it.
Speaking of advice, I want to give some to anyone who is considering following the advice Ms. Introverts are outnumbered about three to one. The introvert is pressured daily, almost from the moment of awakening, to respond and conform to the outer world.
I think the playing field of life needs to be evened out a little. Extroverts get most of the good press. We are ripe for a cultural shift toward the okayness of introversion. We need to appreciate our own shape as it is.
This book aims to help us do this. In it you will learn three basic things: Although I enjoyed many aspects of being a librarian, I wanted to work on a more personal level with people.
Facilitating individual growth and development to help others live more satisfying lives felt like a gratifying life purpose for me.
In graduate school, I learned about the phenomena of introversion as a distinct temperament or style for the second time.
As part of my coursework, I took a few personality tests, and, on several of them, I came out as an introvert. I was surprised. When my professors discussed the results, they explained that introversion and extroversion are on opposite ends of an energy continuum. Where we fall on that continuum predicts how we derive our life energy. People on the more introverted end of the continuum focus inward to gain energy. People on the more extroverted end of the continuum focus outward to gain energy.
This fundamental difference in focus can be seen in practically everything we do. My professors emphasized the positive aspects of each temperament and made it clear that each was okay—just different. The concept of different energy requirements clicked with me. I began to understand my need to be alone to recharge my batteries. It finally dawned on me that nothing was wrong with me; I was just introverted.
As I became informed about the strengths and weaknesses of introverts, I felt less ashamed. When I learned the ratio of extroverts to introverts—three to one—I realized I lived in a world structured for all those outies. No wonder I felt like a fish out of water. I was living in a sea of extroverts! I also began to have insights into why I hated the large staff meetings I was required to attend every Wednesday evening at the counseling center where I was an intern.
I understood why I rarely spoke in group supervision, and why my mind would often vapor lock whenever I was in a room with more than a few people. He thought introversion and extroversion were like two chemicals: When they are combined, each can be transformed by the other. He also saw this as a natural built-in way for us to appreciate complementary qualities in one another. I remember when the two of us went to Las Vegas after we were first married.
I staggered through the casino, my brain numbed. Colors danced everywhere, and lights exploded in my eyes. I kept asking Mike, How much farther is it to the elevator?
They do that tricky thing in Las Vegas, making you walk through a maze of shiny machines, misted in cigarette smoke, to get to the elevator and the quiet oasis of your room. My husband, the extrovert, was ready to rock and roll. His cheeks were rosy, and his eyes sparkled—all the noise and action excited him.
I was pea green and felt like a trout I once saw lying on a bed of crushed ice in a fish market. At least the trout got to lie down. Later, when I woke up from my nap, I was surrounded by two hundred silver dollars Mike had won.
Obviously, extroverts have many charms. And they are a good balance for us introverted types. They help us go out and about. We help them slow down. One afternoon, Julia, an introverted client, and I were brainstorming about how she could manage an upcoming training workshop. I am dreading it, she told me.
We developed several strategies to help her get through it, and, as she got up to leave, she lowered her head and looked me intently in the eye.
I still hate schmoozing, you know, she said. As if she thought I expected her to be a social butterfly. I know, I said, I still hate it myself. We sighed together in a knowing way. As I closed my office door, I thought about my own struggle with introversion. I would think, Oh, I wish they realized that nothing is wrong with them. They are just introverted. Her eyes widened in surprise. Why do you think that? Then I explained that introversion is a collection of traits that we are born with.
She looked so relieved. They thought of it in terms of pathology, not temperament. When I submitted my dissertation for my psychoanalytic degree on the subject, I was moved to tears by the incredible response I got, and I was excited by the comments I received from many of my colleagues. I know how powerful it can be when the shame of being introverted is lifted. Once I made this connection, I realized I had to write a book to help people understand introversion.
This happens for three reasons.
First, introverts can imagine the vastness of any subject. Second, they have had the experience of their brain locking, so in an attempt to avoid that awful blank-mind moment, they overprepare by accruing as much information as they can. Although I had worked with introverts for years and studied introversion in depth, I wanted to know what new research was available about the physiology and genetics of introverted brains.
When I typed in the subject heading of introversion, I was surprised to find that more than two thousand journal citations appeared in the fields of personality, temperament, neurophysiology, and genetics. Most of the research had been conducted in European countries, where introversion is more accepted as a form of inborn temperament. In Chapter 3, I will discuss some of the research findings that explain introversion in terms of genetic and physiological endowment.
My second step was to check out the Internet, since I thought lots of innies might hang out there. I found several hundred sites about introversion. Many of the websites were linked to the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, a widely used personality assessment based on four aspects of temperament. Developed by Isabel Myers and Katharine C.
Rather, it looks at innate preferences. Introversion is also included on several sites about giftedness, as there is a correlation between introversion and intelligence. The library and Internet research were very useful and illuminating, but I learned the most about introversion from my own experiences and those of my clients, and from the people I interviewed for this book. I interviewed more than fifty people from many walks of life including writers, ministers, therapists, historians, teachers, artists, college students, researchers, and computer professionals.
Names and some identifying details have been changed. A number of interviewees had taken the Myers-Briggs Inventory, and so they knew they were innies. Even though they were not selected with any specific career criteria in mind, a surprising number were in what Dr.
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